Life Reimagined with Wendy Deacon

The Top 5 Keys to Become More Resilient

October 21, 2020
Life Reimagined with Wendy Deacon
The Top 5 Keys to Become More Resilient
Show Notes Transcript

How will you stay the course when the waters get choppy?

Are you prepared? How will you navigate the next storm?  Life is unpredictable - even more so in 2020 - so you've most likely already had to navigate a number of changes in your daily living, but what about a real storm?  What about a primary breadwinner's job loss?  A scary health diagnosis?  A loss of a close relationship?  

Join me as I reflect on the stories from our new book on the common thread and themes that helped these women not only survive but thrive through their storm or unexpected life detour, and I'll share what I believe to be the top 5 critical steps you'll need to successfully stay afloat.

How will you stay the course when the waters get choppy?

Are you prepared? How will you navigate the next storm?  Life is unpredictable - even more so in 2020 - so you've most likely already had to navigate a number of changes in your daily living, but what about a real storm?  What about a primary breadwinner's job loss?  A scary health diagnosis?  A loss of a close relationship?  

Join me as I reflect on the stories from our new book on the common thread and themes that helped these women not only survive but thrive through their storm or unexpected life detour, and I'll share what I believe to be the top 5 critical steps you'll need to successfully stay afloat.

Hey there - welcome back to Life Reimagined with Wendy and thanks for joining.  Its been great to see the reception to our newest book, Life Unexpected to Life Inspired, available now on Amazon.com and on my website, www.destinationuwendy.com. The book is a part of a multimedia collaborative and it includes stories from an amazing and diverse group of women.  What I find fascinating are the common threads or key steps that they each took independently but that they all have in common that really made the difference.  The difference in helping them come through to the other side stronger, happier and personally much more resilient. 

Sure, their success didn't happen overnight, but one of the key takeaways for me in getting to know them better and in hearing each of their stories is the significance of their daily choices and their mental fortitude.  These and a few other traits were instrumental in helping them keep taking those baby steps forward and to be able to keep making progress to not only survive the detour or roadblock but actually thrive and end up on a much better path personally and professionally.

I hope you've had a chance to listen in to my interviews on the previous podcast episodes, as hearing more details about their personal struggles and story is so much more fun.  Plus you get to hear their selection for best 80's TV show that influenced them in our younger days.

Maybe you are like me and had to deal with divorce. 

Maybe you are like Rosie who had to deal with multiple job changes and decided to invest personally in another career direction. 

Maybe you are like Heather with new health challenges and way more food sensitivities than you could envision. 

Maybe you are like Lupe and Barbara who traveled down unplanned detours after years of corporate experience and success - changes in their corporate positions that sounded like many other women in their 40s and 50s.

Maybe You were like Cindy who had joyous news interrupt her career earlier than expected and she chose family over climbing the corporate ladder. 

Maybe you are like Gabbe who feels for the first time that she is not a passenger in her own life but finally driving her own car. 

Maybe you are like Kimberly who experienced divorce, loss of love, finding new love, and a new baby, all within an unexpected short time. 

Maybe you are like Shannon, who experienced significant financial hardships but is now getting ready to open her new business.

Maybe you are like Teresa who sustained a traumatic brain injury and after tons of therapy and help, are in a position now influencing many, many more than she ever previously envisioned. 

Maybe you are fortunate to not have experienced any of these detours or maybe you've experienced a very different life event, life detour, or trauma and are still in the midst of getting through it.  Regardless of where you are today, what have you learned from getting through these storms? How will you handle the next big one?

In considering mine and the experiences of my coauthors, I've concluded there are really 5 critical steps you need to be ready to more masterfully get through the hurdles you don't even know are yet to come in your life. So let's dive in. The good news is it's easy to remember - the 5 Rs. Rejuvenate, Regroup, Reframe, Reprioritize and Review.  

 

1.      OK so step number one to Rejuvenate. You have to take care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually every day so that you are in the best position possible to deal with any hiccups or any stress you encounter. You should know yourself and have confidence in your strength.  Make intentional and good daily choices so that you can avoid unnecessary trauma or unnecessary drama and keep these small embers from becoming bigger fires and bigger problems in your life. 

2.      Step #2 is to Regroup.  If you have done what you can to prevent problems and take care of yourself but that stress or detour has a way of finding you, the next step is to pause,  breathe and regroup. Charging too quickly into "fix-it" mode will only hinder your long term progress and risk taking you down another rabbit hole. Take that moment to really pause and regroup so that you can be smarter about the sequence and timing of your next steps. And hopefully this will more quickly lead to your ultimate resolution. 

3.      #3 is to Reframe.  If you've heard any of my messages or read any of my work to date, you've already heard me bring up this term as I believe as I continue to age reframing is something that's critical to happiness. You have to stop and think differently about the situation. You should keep it in perspective - is it really the end of the world?  I find that I'm way less knocked off my balance by what would have been much more significant in my 20s or 30s.  Yes it may suck that it's happening to you . Yes it sucks that you're in the middle of something you don't want to have to deal with. However there is a reason or there may be a benefit that will come out of your experience, even if you don't see it yet. Decide that it WILL be something that contributes to your life in the end and will eventually be a positive. No, it doesn't solve all of your problems or make the trauma magically disappear, but it makes it easier to tackle. 

4.      #4 is to Reprioritize.  Think of it like triage in the Emergency Department and identify the most urgent needs first.  What can literally be put on the back burner while you deal more quickly with the fire that is currently out of control?  Create the steps in to smaller and more do-able pieces so that you can execute one at a time and gain more progress and more confidence as you continue through them.  This may not be a one-time exercise, but instead a constant reshuffling of the daily tasks tugging on you, so know that this may continue to be fluid but although it may feel like the regrouping and reframing repeatedly is slowing you down, it may ultimately be the fastest path to resolution or success.

5.      Finally, #5 is to Review.  What the hell just happened?  What did you learn from the experience that makes life better or helps you minimize the chance of it surfacing again and impeding you in the future?  Who in your support or significant other circle were helpful?  Who could you count on?  This is a step many people forget but every time you learn from these experiences, you have a better chance at spotting them earlier, before they get out of control, and wreak less havoc in your world.  The best case scenario is that you now can possibly even avoid going through it again all together.  

Rejuvenate, Regroup, Reframe, Reprioritize, Review - not hard or at least fairly easy in theory but hopefully easier to utilize and be better prepared to leverage.  It does not solve world hunger, but in even spending a few minutes today listening in and focusing on these 5 Rs, you're actively taking the small but significant steps to going from a Life Unexpected to your own Life Inspired.  To weathering the storms easier and to hopefully living more happily and the best life possible.

I hope you'll check out our new book on Amazon - also available on my website.  I invite you to lean in with our DestinationU community to connect with others similarly investing time into making this the best chapter in their life yet.  You can find more information and resources at www.destinationuwendy.com.  You can join us for free, easy personal challenges each week in our DestinationU Facebook Group.  You can follow me on Instagram and coming soon - YouTube - to hopefully inspire you to try something new and to provide resources for healthier and happier living over 40 or 45.

Thanks again for listening.  And thanks for taking time in your personal health and just hang in there - remember to Rejuvenate, Regroup, Reframe, Reprioritize and Review and keep taking the steps to ensure you're better prepared to try to avoid or handle that next big storm.